Let’s Talk About Boundaries
Boundaries can be such a touchy topic because people see them as blocking others out. But how about this -
rather than solid walls, boundaries are like gates.
If you have a gate in front or around your house, people can still see through them and can have access to your house. Being the person in the house, you have the choice to let them in or not.
Guarding Your Heart
In last month’s devotional, I touched on boundaries too. I don’t mean to sound repetitive, but in this season of my life, I am really starting to secure my boundaries. I’ve reflected on things I should have done in the past. There are times that I gave in and “loved too much.” As I started to talk to my leaders and ask for God’s guidance, I’ve learned that setting boundaries is a way to teach others how to love you.
Our hearts are deceitful (Jeremiah 17:9) and God has advised us to guard our hearts (Proverbs 4:23). Knowing this, we all need to set some boundaries in order to protect ourselves and the relationship we have with Christ. Boundaries aren’t meant to hurt others, they’re meant to help.
We often hear people preach about self-care and self-love. Setting boundaries is a way to take care of yourself, to prevent hurt and disappointment in the future.
Setting Boundaries in Your Relationships
Whether it’s in your friendships or with your significant others, setting boundaries is a must.
There will be times that we are put into uncomfortable positions. Some people won’t realize your discomfort, so you need to set things straight.
“Just say a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ Anything beyond this is from the evil one”
Matthew 5:37
This verse may seem a little extreme, but it sets an example of how the enemy can take advantage when we let our guards down.
Sometimes putting our foot down can be intimidating because we’re thinking of how the other person will react. But if this person really wants to show you love, they should respect your boundaries. Vice versa. This becomes a form of accountability throughout your relationships.
When it comes to friends, remember that it is okay to say no to hanging out sometimes and you don’t have to tell them every little thing, and they shouldn’t force you to. If lines are crossed, you may be called to distance yourself and love them from afar instead.
This also ties into relationships with a significant other. In order to keep Christ at the center, set boundaries that keep you away from temptation. There may be occasions where you feel the urge to give in because you love them and they love you, but if that was completely true, they wouldn’t try to put you into uncomfortable situations.
Take time to reflect on the relationships in your life that need boundaries or more of them. What are things you can let go of in order to keep Christ at the center of your relationships? What needs to be set in place for you to enjoy your Christ-centered relationships?
“But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father…”
Matthew 6:6
Jesus set boundaries to get away from the world in order to talk to the Father. Do this too. Pray for the guidance and discernment to establish boundaries in your relationships with people and your relationships with social media, etc. Remember that this isn’t one-sided and you have to have these conversations within your relationships.
I pray that I was able to give you all a little more insight to the importance of boundaries. I pray that the enemy will not have a foothold on your fellowship with one another, and that you continue to be extensions of God’s love in your relationships.
Praying for and loving you always,
Angeli <3